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| Ok, it has been forever since I have written on this
website. Like, seriously, I never thought I would ever be here again. I
know that Whitney, Joanna, and Sam will read it though, so here is my
two cents on the song that Sam posted the other day.
As a girl, and an aspiring fashion designer, this song
hits a nerve for me. Especially now that I'm trying to get over Mr.
Willoughby.  *cough
cough* Anways, I know I have asked not just in my love life, but with
my friends, what is wrong with me? I have had my share of betrayals
from people I thought were friends, and then wonder where I went wrong.
Even lately, I have been aking the same stupid question, what did I do wrong?
I asked God this stupid question, and he simply said...nothing.
As hard as it is, we just need to come to the realization that
sometimes, when people don't do the things we want them to do, it's not
that we did anything wrong, it's just that the other person was being
stupid. I know I'm going to eat these words later, but it's true.
I had to fight the unbeautiful lie too. I still fight it to this
day. I fought really hard with it in high school when Joanna got a
boyfriend and I didn't. It still made we wonder, what was wrong with
me? Why didn't anyone want me? Finally I just had to put my foot down.
I realized I wasn't going to live life like a victim. It was hard, but
God helped me a lot.I started t play dress up, and I really liked it.
People told me I looked cool, and of course that made me happy. So I
kept doing it. Over time and trials, I understood a lot of the things I
did and did not need, and then I started to lose weight without even
trying cause I didn't need food anymore.
As for myself, I'll start excercising more when the blister on the back of my right heel stops bleeding.
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| I've been gone one month adn there is only one comment down there....xanga *takes off hat* You have been faithful...but I must leave you now....*sheds tear and goes back to myspace* | | |
| Ok, well...It's been a while since I have updated...things are going
pretty good. I'm really excited about the new year...Any New Years
Resolutions out there?
Awsome CD. \m/
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| So today was an awsome day for me. Not only cause two of the sweetest
people I know got together, but that God revealed to me through Sam (I
luv you man!) the meaning of a prophesy spoken over me last summer. It
was prayed over me by two different people to see people the way that
God sees people. I didn't understand what that meant. I prayed to God
asking him to show me what it meant, and all the while there were people coming to
me with low self esteem issues, and stuff. And I felt cruddy about it
cause even though I would try to tell them what awsome people that they
were, it seemed to have no avail. I felt I was pouring water into a
bottomless pit.
Tonight I was talking to Sam about these feelings.
Cause I had been feeling it for a while. I asked him why people around
me always had low self esteem. he said it was because they didn't know
who they were in Christ Jesus.
[22:52] littlbear1989: Why do people have such low self esteem?
[22:52] ZantarBlack: They don't know who they are
[23:06] littlbear1989: You really think so?
[23:07] ZantarBlack: If you know who you really are - if you know
what kind of person God made you to be, how God sees you, really
grasped the image of God they were made in, knew how they were redeemed
in Christ...there would be no need for self-image problems
[23:07] littlbear1989: Hmmm...
[23:08] littlbear1989: I guess that's true.
[23:08] littlbear1989: Then I wish more people knew who they wre!
[23:08] ZantarBlack: Yep
[23:08] littlbear1989: So I woulnd't have to tell them!
[23:08] littlbear1989: haha
[23:08] ZantarBlack: That's actually in my list of "ongoing life
objectives". To see people for who they really are and help them see it
as well
And then it hit me like a load of bricks...all this time I had been
doing what was prophesied over me, and I didn't even know it. And even
though I felt like I was pouring water into a bottomless pit, God is an
endless source. It wasn't anything I could do to help them, but it was
only something that Gid could do through me. So yeah...I do get to go
out with a Bang after all... To God be all the glory and the honor and the power!
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|  | Currently Watching
Eragon
By Edward Speleers, Sienna Guillory, Garrett Hedlund, Djimon Hounsou, Jeremy Irons, John Malkovich, Robert Carlyle, Joss Stone, Tamsin Egerton, Gary Lewis (III), �gnes B�nfalvy, P�l Makrai, Tam�s De�k (II), Jaymes Butler, Michael Mehlmann, Matt Devere, Caroline Chikezie, Alexandra Zhang, Alun Armstrong, Steven Spiers
see related |
It was not as bad as many of you people like to think it is. haha
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